Dating rules glamour
It made me realize that we all have dating rules we make for ourselves—some logical, some just plain silly.
We'd been flirting at a birthday party, and when things were winding down, she offered to drop me off at home. I told myself I wouldn't want to go out with someone who treats people that way anyway, which was true, but I was still insulted.
It was kind of like that house De Niro had in We chatted, laughed, and soon started making out. When she was leaving, I said, "Tanya, you're a charming lady...." She said, "Aziz, you're a charming guy." The encounter seemed promising. (Tanya had been singing that Drake song at the party and knew all the lyrics.) I felt confident. There I was, maniacally checking my phone, going through this tornado of panic, all because this person hadn't written me a short message on a dumb little phone.
As everyone in the room had agreed, we were both charming people. I wasn't head over heels for Tanya, but she seemed cool, and it felt like we had a good connection. I didn't end up going to the concert that night.
I wanted to see Tanya again and was faced with the conundrum that plagues us all: How and when do I communicate next? As I waited for her response, I pictured our hypothetical relationship. By then I was panicked: Should I have typed "Hey" with two y's, not just one? Instead I went to a comedy club, and in my stand-up talked about the frustration and self-doubt this whole "silence" nonsense had provoked in the depths of my being.
But in a strange way we're all in it together, and we should take solace in the fact that no one has a clue what's going on.
The big changes—technological developments like smartphones, online dating, and social media sites—are obvious. In a very short period, the whole culture of searching for love and a mate has radically changed.A century ago people would find a decent person who lived in their neighborhood.Perhaps next weekend we would go see a movie at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery? Minutes went by and the status of my text went to READ. I got laughs but also something bigger—the audience and I were connecting on a deeper level.Maybe I could cook Tanya dinner and try out that brick chicken recipe I'd been eager to attempt? I watched as those little i Phone dots popped up—the ones that tell you that someone's typing—but then THEY VANISHED. She's probably just crafting her perfectly witty response, I thought. Every guy and girl in the room had their own Tanya.She started a draft, didn't feel good about it, and wanted to get back to it later. She also probably didn't want to seem overeager. Yet we all sit alone, staring at this black screen with a whole range of emotions. I kept debating whether I should send anything, but I felt it would be too desperate and accepted that Tanya wasn't interested.